Reflections.

Today we stayed in our pajamas all morning. It's almost lunchtime, maybe we'll get dressed after we eat. We're going to picnic on the floor in the living room for lunch and watch a movie. It's a beautiful day outside, so the windows are open. This weekend maybe we'll move our picnic outside. Today, I'm still feeling pretty vulnerable, so we're shut in.

Today we played in the kitchen. I kept the baby gate down all morning. I sat in the kitchen and blew bubbles and the kids chased them down giggling. I let them play on the couch cushions on the floor. We giggled and played and tickled each other.

I just let them be.

It was carefree. It was relaxed.

My heart is heavy. Life can end so suddenly. It scares me what can happen. I realize I can't live in fear of the future, but it's hard to escape that reality sometimes.

We have to keep living. We have to embrace our loved ones. We have to keep taking chances and pushing ourselves. We have to become better people.

I'm trying to be optimistic.